“Inwardly I speak to the Father. I pour my heart out to the Comforter and sense His peace in the middle of the grief. The burden is still with me, but the pressure of it is lightened in His presence. And I’m reminded that His strength comes to me as I yoke myself to Jesus and allow Him to share in the carrying of my grief. In doing so, I am locked into His power that walks with me step by step through the struggle.
When life is jagged and darkness taunts us like a bully, how can we see beyond the despair that grips us?
I surely don’t have a simple list of answers, but I do know this: when grief runs deep God’s comforting love runs deeper still.
The peace we long for and the rest we are desperate for will always be found in the arms of Jesus. And those arms are constantly reaching out to us.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matthew 11:28-29)
This is the invitation Jesus gives to each of us.
If you find yourself in a place of unrest… if you are trying to sift through a landslide of soul sorrow… if you are carrying a heavy load, will you turn toward Hope and accept His invitation right now? ” – excerpt from Girlfriends In God
I shrink back over the fact that I am still struggling. I’m having a hard time not beating myself up that, though I feel God has given me some real clarity & answers on some things I couldn’t grasp, I am still in this place of grief. It is better, but it still darkens my day periodically. I know it will pass. And I know I need to give myself more grace. Because the loss I feel runs deep. Because I really wanted to believe so much that it was a good thing, a God thing. And I am not convinced in some ways that it wasn’t. He says He uses all these things for our good. One day I will see the beauty in the ash heap that is left behind it. All the way ’round.
I know this ~ through it I have spent more time in prayer, more time in worship, more time on my face, more time in the word ~ than I have in a while. Some days I can hardly wait to get home at lunch or after work & just settle into that quiet space. To give Him the things racing through my soul at breakneck speed. To give Him my tears & my grief. To unload them because I am exhausted with carrying it all. I truly feel an exchange when I do. Even if it’s just a tiny shift, I recognize the movement of it away from me & the replacement He gingerly lays there. Of His love, His grace & His mercy. Filling the hollowed out chambers inside me left in the wake of this upheaval that I never saw coming.
As much as we have God walking with us all our lives, we also have an enemy. I rarely mention him, because he gets no fanfare from me – but I see that it is a reality. Always a counterfeit, he brings confusion, and he is the father of all lies. Taking our weaknesses, the things about us he has learned from years of observation & he pecks away at them. Using them against us. Trying to to rob us of joy, of life & the love that God gives so liberally.
We MUST stand firm on our faith.
We MUST not let this enemy’s devices prosper.
Remember, the battle belongs to God.
He HAS already won.
For you & for me.
It was, it is & it will always remain. Finished.
Stand on that. Lay on it, crawl –
Whatever you can do this morning.
But do it.
God will meet you right there. He will.
I know it like I know the worn lines on the backs of my hands.
Our God is able.
Much love y’all, & turning it all over to Him ~ over & over till we can truly let go,
The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and He helps me. – Psalm 28:7
(image courtesy of pinterest)